2 Techniques to Objectively Decide on a New Job

//2 Techniques to Objectively Decide on a New Job

Decide on a job

Dear Coach Wolfgang:

I received an offer for a new job but there are a lot of benefits in my current job. I really get along well with my co-workers and it is closer to my house than the new opportunity. How do I choose between the two?

Thank you for the question. Congratulations on receiving a job offer! There is often a misconception when people accept a new job offer that they did not like their prior job. Many times, however, there were many positive aspects about the prior job and the new position simply offers some better opportunities.

How To Decide Which Job to Accept

For those of you who have ever changed jobs or companies, you know how difficult it can be to decide to leave your existing position or company. This is especially true if you enjoyed your work, your co-workers, the company culture, or even just the company’s location.

When you are deciding to take a new offer, you may be torn. Not only would you be leaving your job but also you would be leaving the intangibles behind such as the people and the environment. It’s the personal aspects – the connections and the relationships – that may be keeping you from committing to a new position. It can be hard to separate emotion from the decision-making process.

There are several components to the career decision-making process but I will highlight two below that help bring objectivity to the process.

  • This is a good time to review your career goals and how your current and new positions are moving you toward those goals. Take a moment to focus on what you are looking to accomplish in your career and which position will ultimately bring you closer to those goals.
  • Review your values list. How does your current position and the new position meet those values?

Stepping back from the situation and evaluating it from these perspectives can make the decision-making process easier.

What was the hardest thing for you to leave in your last job?  Let us know in the comments section below!

By | 2017-04-22T18:47:48+00:00 January 6th, 2011|Job Search|55 Comments

About the Author:

Amy Wolfgang is a career coach and owner of Wolfgang Career Coaching. She brings over 15 years of corporate and coaching experience to help her clients excel in their careers. She is a certified PCM (Professional Career Manager) and has a Master’s degree in Educational Psychology from The University of Texas at Austin. Amy is dedicated to helping her clients become empowered and confident in their career.

55 Comments

  1. Marie April 14, 2011 at 3:02 pm - Reply

    That’s definitely some good advice, and deciding between two jobs is a tough decision give the impact it can have on your life and future. I was reading the Burchard & Associates Professional Pointers blog post about how to decide between two job offers. It suggested to first try to forget about the money aspect, so your decision isn’t bases solely on the one with a high salary. That way you can accurately and without bias compare the two decisions based on your career goals, as you stated. Good points.

  2. Diane February 3, 2013 at 2:25 pm - Reply

    I love my coworkers (mentors) at my current job. I have been open about interviewing with another organization. My director is trying very hard to arrange a promotion for me but I’m afraid it is an up hill battle and will not happen in time to keep me. I am very emotionally tied to my current job. The new job has a better title, pay and a lot more responsibilities. I have been praying for a new opportunity, here it is … Why am I so torm?

    • Coach Wolfgang February 26, 2013 at 4:46 am - Reply

      Diane,
      Thanks for the comment. Sometimes stepping out of your comfort zone is a hard thing to do, even if the new opportunity is better. All of this is part of the natural process. You also might be scared to leave your coworkers and relationships you’ve created at work, but your friend ships can continue outside of work. If you feel this new opportunity is best for your career and health then you know what to do. Hope this helped.

      Coach Wolfgang

  3. kei_santos March 8, 2013 at 2:32 pm - Reply

    Hi, my current job is marketing exec For a recruitment firm been with the company for 8 mons, I have a job offer for an account executive position in an IT industry. They offered a high salary and great comish scheme compared to my current job. I signed the JO and decided to resign but didnt push through with the resignation cause my manager resigned, so Im next in line. She said I might be offered the manegerial position but not sure until our CEo will discuss with me. Im torn on what to choose the new job with high salary and better comish but its hard core sales for IT products and services while the other one is marketing manager or project manager with less salary and straigh comish quarterly, comish relies on our replacemt since its a recruitment firm. the old job is kinda near my place while the new job takes 40min-1 hr. i dont know which job to choose, the promotion or new job offer. help!

    • Amy Wolfgang March 19, 2013 at 12:56 am - Reply

      Deciding on your next position, whether at the same company or a new opportunity can be very difficult for many of the reasons you list. It’s a big decision, and I have a few thoughts for you to help in your decision-making process:
      – Ask yourself, what are your top 5 values in a job (stability, advancement, independence, location etc)? Once you have identified those values, how does each opportunity meet those values? Does one meet more of them or to a better degree?
      – What career or job do you hope to be in after this position? Or what position do you hope to have in 3-5 years? Do either of these jobs provide you with the skills and experience that will help you move to your future position more quickly?
      There are many factors in choosing your next position. I hope by answering the questions above, you have a good start toward your answer!

  4. Kayla January 14, 2015 at 2:36 am - Reply

    I graduated from college a year and a half ago with a marketing degree and in May I will graduate with an MBA, unfortunately, I cannot find a position that requires anything less than three years experience in the data analysis field. I continue to reach by submitting my application regardless of the requirements but it appears as though HR is quickly scanning through the applications and quickly knocking me out due to my lack of experience. The company I currently work for has the mentality that in order to be successful employees must work their way up, which is aligned with my core values as well. I have no problem working to achieve success. Recently I received an offer with my company for an analyst position but it is still considered an entry level position. They offer only a modest raise but still consider me an hourly employee. The position is in another state but does not offer moving compensation. I’m not sure if I should accept the position because it allows me to gain the necessary experience or if I should continue to remain underemployed in my current position. I believe that my masters degree should allow me to be considered for roles more demanding than the position I am being offered. My potential coworkers have little to no education. I don’t want to sell myself short professionally. My career goals is to become an independent marketing consultant. In my spare time I have begun creating marketing analysis that include e-marketing and social media plans for local businesses in order to gain more experience. I do this work for free because my city is very poor and these mom and pop stores have great potential for growth. I intend to let this grow into an actual business, working off referrals from the customers I provided free services to.

    • Coach Wolfgang January 16, 2015 at 6:09 pm - Reply

      Thank you for the comment! It seems to me you are being very thoughtful about how to strategically move your career forward. I applaud your initiative to start an entrepreneurial venture that will provide you with experience as well as meet your values.

      I completely understand how you are caught in a catch-22 situation. You want to utilize what you have learned in your schooling, but are missing the required experience to be able to get a position that allows you to use this knowledge. I have a few questions for you to consider:
      – What type of experience will you gain from the analyst position? In what ways will this position provide you with experience in the career field you seek?
      – What are the risks of taking the new position, aside from moving? What are the risks in staying with your current position?
      – What services does your MBA office provide to help you find a position following graduation?
      – What is your job search strategy aside from applying for positions online? What is your networking strategy?

      I hope, in answering these questions, you will continue to positively move forward in your search for a position that utilizes your education and experience to date! Best, Coach Wolfgang

  5. Rose February 13, 2015 at 11:17 pm - Reply

    I am torn between my old position and a new position. I work for an attorney as a paralegal.I write the briefs and get the cases ready for hearing. It is challenging and deadline driven work. I have been with the same attorney for eleven years. I had not received a raise for five years and was put off with promises of a review ovwe and over again.Finally I saw an opening in the same field working for a judge I write briefs against when the opinion is not in our favor. I was offered a position as his assistant. This job would be less stressful and has benefits.The money is about the same as the money my boss finally came up with (4,000.00 a year)after I gave notice. I am torn because in my position now I can come and go as I please. I have worked a few 8-5. It is a huge perk to be able to come and go. I am afraid that less responsibility and a more rigid schedule would be hard.benefits would be good at thenew position as the place i am now as none. Any advice would be much appreciated.

    • Coach Wolfgang February 19, 2015 at 10:57 pm - Reply

      Congratulations on your job offer, Rose! Deciding whether to remain in your current position or take a chance on a new opportunity is never easy. If you stay where you are, you may be faced with stagnation and ongoing frustration. If your recent history in that position reflects unfulfilled promises and a lack of growth, it could be unlikely that the situation there will change anytime soon.

      On the other hand, taking a new position would involve several adjustments. After eleven years in one place, you may have developed feelings of competence and comfort that could be difficult to leave behind. Some challenges you may face include:

      • Earning credibility with others as you prove yourself in a new role
      • Gaining confidence when it comes to learning new systems and procedures
      • Adjusting to a new work environment, culture, schedule, and set of expectations

      I would recommend doing a values assessment to figure out what factors are truly the most important to you, and using that information to guide your decision. Some of the factors you mentioned are flexibility (the ability to come and go as you please vs. an 8-5 schedule), responsibility (challenging work vs. less stress), and compensation (salary alone vs. salary + benefits). What other concerns would you say are the most important at this time in your career, and which opportunity seems to currently align the most closely? What about in 5 years, 10 years, and beyond?

      After doing a thorough assessment of the factors above, do a “gut check” to see what your intuition is telling you. Does the evidence point one way, but deep down you were hoping it would give you a different answer?

      Finally, keep in mind that it may be possible to negotiate flexibility in your schedule with the new offer. If losing flexibility is your main concern, it never hurts to ask!

      Hope this will help you systematically evaluate the options and make your decision with confidence!

      Best of luck,
      Coach Wolfgang

  6. Rose February 13, 2015 at 11:20 pm - Reply

    Pardon the typos in that last comment… it was talk to text.

  7. Sarah March 8, 2015 at 10:31 am - Reply

    Help me coach! I work in a very niche industry with very few specialists in my field, which is great for job opportunities for me! I currently work for a large global company as one of 5 in my field, and have just been told I will be promoted and will be getting direct reports – great! But there is still a long reporting chain to the top, and those top positions are not in an overseas location that I would never be willing to relocate to. There is also a chance down the road that my office will relocate anyways. I have also just been offered a new job with another global company, that is staying put in my area, but would be starting up my division all on my own, which puts me at the top. However, there are no direct reports, and the commute is significantly more stressful. The pay is exactly the same, so that is not an area of concern. I’m quite happy at my current job due to my easy commute and great coworkers, but I do get concerned about how high I can climb because of my unwillingness to relocate to those upper level positions, or potential office relocation. Do I take the chance with the stable new company (which the coworkers also seem very nice), but suffer with the commute and potentially high workload with no reports? Any help is appreciated!

    • Coach Wolfgang March 11, 2015 at 3:06 pm - Reply

      Thank you for writing! I can absolutely understand the dilemma you find yourself in – I’ve been there and have had many clients in a similar position. You mentioned some factors or values that are important to you in a career: opportunities for career advancement, managing direct reports, commute, team members, balance in workload, etc. To help you with this choice, I suggest you spend some time identifying the factors and values that are most important to you in your career. Limit it to 5-10. Then place a priority on the values you selected – some will be more important than others. For each factor, list the likelihood that each opportunity meets that factor? And to what degree (strongly meets it, somewhat meets it, etc). Compare opportunity A and B against all of your factors for the likelihood they will meet the factor and to what degree. This exercise should provide some clarity for you on how each opportunity truly meets what is important to you. Let me know if you have any questions and good luck!

  8. Alison March 27, 2015 at 12:17 pm - Reply

    Need some help!
    I’m only 21 and have been working at the same job for 3 years – starting in an admin position and Have now completed 2 diplomas. at the moment Im not even completing what my diplomas were for – i’m still doing a lot of admin for my boss and now for new people that have come into the business who are doing just the ‘one job’ they are qualified for (and less experience than me). I’ve discussed with my boss a couple times that I want to focus on a specialty, he continues to promise me that the business is growing and changing (which it is) and that the opportunities will be here soon and that someone will be hired to replace my position – still not happened and it’s now been over 6 months. I have a lot of flexibility and love the people i work with, and i work more than anyone else – usually late at night and on weekends. I’ve now been offered another job – the base salary is the same but the commission structure not quite as good. it is however with a national company which has a great reputation and massive support behind it.I’m concerned that I will miss out on opportunities at my current job, as i’ve been there from the beginning and when it grows bigger. on top of that – i was there from the beginning when it was my boss and 2 of us. not to mention he has paid for all my courses I feel like i would be leaving him high and dry – but I want to get further in my career.

    • Coach Wolfgang April 3, 2015 at 4:44 am - Reply

      Hi Alison,
      I can completely empathize with your position. You feel a sense of loyalty not only to your boss but to a company you have been with from the very beginning. It sounds like it has been a mutually beneficial relationship up until this point. You have provided a ton of results for the company and have excelled in a role you have outgrown. Your company has paid you to further your education.

      I commend you for having open conversations with boss about the types of growth areas you are seeking in the company. If you were to go to your boss and let him know your frustrations with the lack of replacement hire for your role and your uncertainty around your future at the firm, what would his reaction to this type of conversation be? What would you need out of this conversation with him that would tell you to turn down the other job offer? Get very clear on what messages and actions from your boss might keep you from leaving. In terms of the other company, consider both the upside and the potential risks. Do you know anyone else who has worked at this company? How does your current work culture/environment compare with this new company? What are their opportunities for growth? What will you be giving up? What will you be gaining? If you turn down this national opportunity, what is the likelihood that you will find a suitable role in your career area in the near future?

      Hopefully answering these questions will give you a solid start in working through your current career situation!

  9. mel June 8, 2015 at 3:30 pm - Reply

    In a toxic environment but it is my dream job. However HR and the Union have done nothing in 10 years to correct the problem and the job is now temporary and could get laid off in the fall. I got another job offer in another province but it’s on call and I may eventually win a permanent spot. No sure if I’m making the right decision. I can’t get leave from my current job to try out this new one.

  10. Chelsea Jade June 9, 2015 at 8:02 pm - Reply

    Hi everyone 🙂
    Some great comments on here, however I am needing a little help myself.
    I currently work at a solicitors and have been there 6-7 months, I do enjoy it, the people are great and there’s a good chance of me getting a training contract.
    However I have just been offered a position which is closer to my home, the firm is huge and has a great reputation, they offer 4 training contracts a year which mean there’s a good chance of me getting one (my current job only offer 1-2 a year)
    I’m torn and have no idea what to do
    The pay is pretty much the same, iv weighed up the pros and cons but they seem to be equal 🙁
    I need help 🙁
    My main concern is the training contract, this is what I need to qualify but either job has not confirmed for definite I will get one
    So I’m stuck 🙁
    And ideas as to what to do?
    Thank you xx

    • Coach Wolfgang June 11, 2015 at 5:34 pm - Reply

      I would start by asking, have you identified your core values in life? After identifying them, how do you define each? Now that you have identified and define those values, how does each position align with those values? This exercise may give you insight into how the organization and position aligns with what is most important in your life. I hope this approach is helpful!

  11. Yemi August 9, 2016 at 11:41 pm - Reply

    Hello Coach.
    I nerd a help in making a job decision . I have been working with an FMCG company for 7 years. The company has a national outlook . For these years, I am a Sales Executive. Two years ago, due to strategic positioning of its range of product,I was moved to a unit specialising in Soap product sales more so because I sell more of soaps while the company exist as a unit. In the process ,there was need for a Regional Sales Manger, I was chosen from the team because I am more qualified academic wise. After nine months , I had an issue with the then head of sales that saw me back to SE. Now ,I got an offer in another firm with a mumtinational outlook as SE, at the same time there is an opening again as Area Sales Manager with my existing firm of seven years. Both companies offer the same amount for the different positions.The new offer has health insurance attached and a vehicle as work tool.The existing one has non. There is potential for great expansion in the new firm as it targets markets in West Africa Sub region ,while the existing firm targets a geographical nation. I am only torn in between titles. Can you give an insigjt which way to go? I will appreciate a response.

    • Coach Wolfgang August 11, 2016 at 6:41 pm - Reply

      Thank you for commenting! Congratulations on the offer. Here is the lens from which I would view your situation: what are my goals for my career in the short-term and long-term? In what ways does each offer get me closer to meeting those goals? In what ways is each offer deficient in helping me work toward those goals? Also, what are the most important factors/values in my life right now? List them out. Define them. Prioritize them. How does each offer compare to your list of most important values? While each may meet some of the values/factors, which one meets more? In what ways? At what priority level?

      I have given you a lot to think about! Good luck!

  12. Jane August 24, 2016 at 3:43 pm - Reply

    Hi Coach, I would really appreciate some help please!! I have been in my current role for 10 years. I have recently (last month) changed from 5 days a week to 4 and I can also work from home a bit. I have two children so this is great. I am not very keen on the job itself it doesn’t really play to my skillset and is quite stressful. There is an industry that I have been very keen to get into and I recently interviewed for my ‘dream job’ within it and was offered the role. Unfortunately they won’t consider any flexibility within the role as it is a brand new role so they are not sure how it will pan out. I would also be taking a pay cut which I am less concerned about. I really want to take the new job but my head is telling me that it would be crazy to give up the opportunity of a 4 day week and it is unfair on my children after waiting all this time to get it!! I am driving myself crazy and need to decide in the next day or so. My number one value is probably flexibility but I have no way of knowing whether that might be an option in the new job. They said it would be at least 12 months before they could consider it. Despite that I am very reluctant to turn it down as I think I would really enjoy the work! Thanks for any advice – my heart and head are in battle over this decision!

    • Coach Wolfgang August 24, 2016 at 8:02 pm - Reply

      I can feel the dilemma between your head and your heart! Here are some thoughts and questions that I hope bring some insight for you.

      • You said your #1 value is probably flexibility. I would start there for clarity. Is flexibility truly your number one value?
      • In your message, you mention family impact, so I am wondering if flexibility is the #1 value or something around family is?
      • How do you define flexibility?
      • How does this new job meet and not meet that definition?
      • What positive and negative implications might this job have on your family life?
      • What are values 2, 3, 4, 5? I think understanding how the new job meets your top 5 values would be helpful to know.
      • How does this new job meet these values?
      • What are the potential opportunities with this job for your future career and personal fulfillment (beyond year 1)?
      • How does your current job stack up for your future career plans?

      Also, pay attention within yourself – what does your heart (or your gut) say?
      Good luck!

      • Jane August 25, 2016 at 8:23 am - Reply

        Thank you so much. It is so true about values 2, 3, 4 and 5 – they are not being met in my current role and will be in the role I have been offered. Also I am not interested in future prospects within my current role as it is not an industry I care much for so it is not sustainable for me long term. I will take the opportunity offered and trust that it will benefit me and my family in the long term. Thanks again that was a very helpful perspective!

        • Coach Wolfgang August 26, 2016 at 3:03 pm - Reply

          Hi Jane, I wish you nothing but the best of luck! Don’t give up on the flexibility value with the new position. See how you might be able to meet that value – even if it is in small ways to start that may be able to grow as you establish yourself in the position.
          Best,
          -Amy Wolfgang

  13. Sammy August 27, 2016 at 4:11 am - Reply

    I need help making a career decision. I’ve been in my current institution for 3 years now. Last year I was offered a similar job a another bank with a higher pay and I end up accepting a counter offer by my current employer. I’m one of the top producer in our market rogue last three years. I requested to be transfer to a closer and busier branch. While waiting to be transfer their were some conflict with some of the team members that caused human resource to investigate of a few incident with a client. While being nervous and want nothing to do with the poor decision of some team members , Makes me nervous when hr is involved.I came across a available position available at a credit union. After I applied they called me the next day for an interview. The following day upper management tells me not to worry about anything, I’m doing a good job and just to forget about the investigation. I have nothing to worry and my transferring is still happening. Well following that I was offered the position with a slightly higher pay, similar benefits. But I fell really bad to accept the new job offer due to the other branch is so excited to have me. I don’t know what to do. New job offer is further out by 10 min and the new branch I’m suppose to transfer is 10 min away. I have kids so being able to get home quick if needed is important, and less stress is a plus.

    • Coach Wolfgang September 6, 2016 at 2:02 pm - Reply

      Thank you for posting your comment! I can understand why you feel conflicted. A few questions for you to consider: You mention that one year ago, you were offered a similar position at another company, but chose to stay with your current company. What made you stay then? Do those same reasons stand?

      Also, what impact will this incident involving HR have on your new position if you are transferred? How will this stay with you? What does this new job at the credit union bring to your overall career development that the job you are transferring into does not? Now consider the other side.

      Whenever possible we want to make intentional career decisions as a way forward, not running away from something else. I encourage you to look at this situation through the entire lens of career management – consider your interests, alignment with your values, the skills you will be utilizing and how they match with your personality traits. Also, how each job sets you up to meet not just near-term, but longer term career goals.

      Good Luck!

  14. Tina Marshall October 7, 2016 at 2:08 am - Reply

    I would so appreciate some input! I’ve been employed as a paralegal at a very small firm for nearly 20 years. Right now, it is just myself, the attorney and another assistant. The three of us have worked together for 9 years. Last week I was offered an interview at a large firm. The new position is a little more money and it offers benefits, including health insurance, which neither myself, nor my husband have. The new job is also a 45 minute drive, while the current job is only 15 minutes away. My boss, who is also my best friend, is very hurt that I even agrees to interview, but I really thought once I had the interview, I would KNOW which job was best for me. It didn’t work out that way. I still have no clue whether I should stay or go. I guess I need some suggestions to gain some clarity in this situation. Any advice would be appreciated.

    • Coach Wolfgang October 7, 2016 at 9:35 pm - Reply

      Hi Tina,
      Thank you for your question! I would start by asking a few questions: what were your initial reasons for interviewing for the new position? What would the new firm offer you? What are the potential downsides of the new job (aside from the ones you mentioned)? What impact will those opportunities have on you, your life, your family? What impact will those negative factors have? What questions remain about your current position and the larger firm that you need answers to before you make the decision?

      These questions are just a start, but I hope they help bring some additional clarity!

  15. Jill January 3, 2017 at 3:43 pm - Reply

    Coach Wolfgang,

    First, thank you for this article. I am a respiratory therapist with a home health company, which means my hours are flexible and I work from home. However, I feel stuck in a rut and there is no room for growth. I am a new mom to 2 Children I have custody of, which makes the flexible schedule ideal. However, I have been offered a job at a healthcare facility; which would have set hours. This position is a huge compliment considering I would be the facilities first therapist. I could see room to grow with this new company, however I am scared that my personal life with the custody issue could get in the way. Can you help me think this through? Thank you!

    • Coach Wolfgang January 3, 2017 at 9:15 pm - Reply

      Hi Jill,
      Thank you for writing! It sounds like this new opportunity meets one of your values – challenge and growth. It sounds as though it could provide you challenge and career growth in many different ways. In terms of the conflict, one suggestion is to write a complete list of the ways this new position conflicts with your custody arrangement. Now for each factor in your list, what are the challenges? What are the opportunities? Once you have that list filled out with both the challenges and the opportunities, the picture may become a bit clearer on where the true conflicts arise and what plans you may need to put in place to address the conflicts. In the end, it may be that this opportunity will not fit with your life right now. If that is the case, you can still build some strong relationships with the organization for opportunities in the future. You will also need to consider how to bring some challenge and growth into your current role that will allow for the flexibility.

  16. Chloe January 23, 2017 at 11:51 am - Reply

    Coach, I’m struggling to make a decision and would appreciate any thoughts or advice.

    I’ve been with the same small company for 7 years. They are a great team of people, I’ve built very strong relationships, have lots of flexibility and understanding and each time I’ve decided to leave (which has happened several times) they have created a new opportunity for me. I have recently moved out of a major city to a smaller town to enable myself to buy a home and surround myself with family for the future. I therefore now have a long commute half time (which detrimentally affects my health) and the rest of the time I work from home which is great for flexibility but I find myself bored and unmotivated. The company aren’t the best in their field but have recognised my special talents and utilise me for these and as a result I’ve landed a great but niche job title within design – which would be amazing for job opportunities in a big city but now wanting to live closer to home leads me with less job propsects should I leave in the future as these sorts of jobs just don’t exist locally. All in all, it’s a great small company of 25 who recognise me but I worry about getting ‘stuck’ without wider experience and I’m not enjoying the commuting/WAH situation.

    I recently found an opportunity to move into a marketing role with a large corporate which longer term would provide more job opportunities outside of major cities. They seem like a nice team and have agreed to put me through some training and I would have a very short and pleasant commute. I’m excited about the prospect of new projects and learning (which is important to me), however, despite some great benefits (which I didn’t have before) it’s a 23% reduction in salary. I’d love to take this new job (and can afford to) with the aim being to move up the ranks to return my salary to it’s current level but the change in salary makes me feel anxious and I can’t seem to get past it. I’m stuck 🙁

    • Coach Wolfgang January 23, 2017 at 7:51 pm - Reply

      Hi Chloe,

      Thank you for writing! That change in salary is something that would likely give many people pause. Here are some questions I have for you:

      – When you think of the new salary, what thoughts and feelings come to mind? List those out. It sounds like these may be messages you need to address at a core level.

      – What new skills will you learn/experiences you will have at this new company?

      – How will those new skills and experiences impact your future job possibilities?

      Five years from now, what types of job/career opportunities will you have if you stay in your current role? How might those be different if you move to this new role?

      I hope these questions bring you some clarity as you make your decision!

  17. Mona February 3, 2017 at 7:56 am - Reply

    Hi

    I am currently confused about 2 job opportunities. I love my current job. I have time for my family, it is closer to my home and the people are amazing. I will able to progress rapidly in my current company and will be more employable afterwards. For the new job offer, it is an opportunity that will not come again. It is the most prestigious company in the country. I will progress with time. Benefits are very attractive. But it is far away from my home. The work will provide me with company van but I will not be able to take my car. Family time will be limited. My family and some colleagues advise me to join the new company.

    • Coach Wolfgang February 3, 2017 at 7:10 pm - Reply

      Hi Mona, it is always tough to decide what you want to do when you have external voices giving you their opinion! Even if they have good intentions by giving their opinion, it doesn’t always help you come to your own conclusion. You have already started to come up with a pros and cons list. To help you make decision, ask yourself what are the most important factors that have to be met for you to have the life you want? What are the most important factors that have to be met for you to have the career you want in the near term? What are the most important factors that have to be met for you to have the career you want 5 years from now?

      Use those questions to compare the two opportunities. Also, to get out of your head and get in touch with your heart, close your eyes, take some deep breaths and ask yourself what you want your career and life to feel like. Get descriptive here. Which opportunity gets you closer to what you want your life and career to feel like? Having two good opportunities to decide on can be very difficult. You have a good start. Use the questions above to deepen your reflection on this opportunity!

  18. Hope February 11, 2017 at 1:54 pm - Reply

    Hi Coach,

    I am currently in a role with a large company that pays well, I enjoy my coworkers and have a great relationship with my manager. I have been here for 15 mos and enjoy the flexibility (have the ability to work from home and have every other Friday off)) but the work itself is not what I want to do long term. I was recently offered a position back in operations in a position I saw myself doing in another year which comes with a nice pay increase but I would have to move and currently I am about an 15 min – 1 hr away from my nieces and nephews and this position would put me 2.5 hrs away. I am comfortable now, have work life balance and great flexibility but the position is not where I see myself in the future. My manager has expressed that he would help me with getting to the role I see myself within the next year but there are never any guarantees and it depends on the roles that are available. The new position is w a company that is in a turnaround situation and putting in lots of money and people to this site and if I were to accept this position and do well, there is lots of room for growth. I’m torn because I would be moving away from my family and I enjoy my work life balance (my previous position was a managerial role with constant stress) and I wasn’t looking for the new role (the recruiter found me on linkedin) BUT this position would be great for my career long term. What would your advice be in this situation?

    • Coach Wolfgang February 13, 2017 at 9:16 pm - Reply

      Hi Hope,
      Thank you for writing. You have two good options in front of you to choose. Both have their upsides and downsides and I can see how difficult it is. On one hand, you have comfort, flexibility, a solid work/life integration, and family. However, this option is lacking challenge or growth. The new opportunity is offering you challenge and growth, but has unknowns in terms of flexibility and positive work/life integration. It also has a downside in terms of your value of family time. It is evident to me that you are seeking challenge and growth from your career. I believe the big unknown for you is will it come from your current organization within a year? If it were guaranteed that within 12 months, your organization would offer you a position that would challenge you, would you leave? If the answer is no, what is in your power to showcase your value and how it would benefit the business to promote you? If the organization does not promote you to a challenging position within the 12 months, then what will your actions be? If growth and challenge are truly leading the charge with you in terms of your career, what other opportunities could you pursue that may be closer to home? Would those opportunities be as plentiful as the opportunity in front of you? I recognize I left you with a lot of questions. This opportunity, while you did not actively seek it out, is causing you to question many things about your current situation. As you continue to explore it through my questions and others, I am confident you will get some additional clarity!

  19. Hope February 17, 2017 at 2:15 am - Reply

    Hi Coach,

    After careful consideration, I realized that the things I currently value most are my work/life balance, flexibility and being near my family. These were the things I was greatly lacking in my previous position that caused me to leave and take the current role I’m in. I believe with the support of my boss and director, I can continue moving up with the current company I’m with. Thank you for your response. I know now that in my current company I need to network a bit more and develop strong relationships with those in positions I am interested in. In addition, there are other companies closer to where I live that may also have the opportunities I am seeking.

    Thanks again for your insight!

    Hope

  20. Stephany March 6, 2017 at 2:45 am - Reply

    Hi Coach,

    I have been working in the same department for going on nine years. I have a wonderful manager who saw something in me when he first came one. He has been working with me for the past 7 years toward a supervisor position but elements keep getting in the way and his higher ups are not buying it. I have done everything they have asked me to and am currently working on my masters. I am extremely frustrated at this point because I continue to do the job of a supervisor but do not get the recognition or pay and really don’t know if I ever will. The position is out there, but no one has really held it. An opportunity has presented itself to use my degree in another position that would also advance my career but doesn’t really reflect what I have been working toward for the last several years. I love the role/responsibility of being a supervisor, I like the people I work with and they really count on me. I have almost made myself too important to my current department, ultimately tying myself to it, which brings me to my next dilemma. I plan on talking to the head of the department tomorrow but their is one hitch, the Manager of that department is also my boss’s boss so he is the same person holding me back from the supervisors position, and me leaving the other department will be detrimental to my current department which is also his responsibility. I don’t know whether I should stay or go. One is a better job than I have now, but the other could be better but my never come to pass. I really like my boss now and we have a great relationship, he has done so much for me and always has my back. We have worked as a team for so long, but I maybe at the highest point I can get to.

    • Coach Wolfgang March 9, 2017 at 5:40 am - Reply

      Thank you for the comment! It sounds like this situation has been a struggle for several years. Some times in order to advance our career, we have to leave the organization or the department, gain some new skills, new experiences and work with different leaders. I am not sure if this is true for you, but your statement that your boss (and advocate) has been trying to promote you (on paper) for 7 years with no movement was telling. What new experiences are waiting for you? What could a new opportunity bring to your life, your career, your perspective, your skills, your new learnings in your Master’s program? Also, what role might fear be playing in your current situation? Hopefully answering these questions sheds some additional light on your situation!

  21. Paul March 30, 2017 at 8:57 pm - Reply

    Hi Coach. I am have been offered a job as a Regional Account Manager that is a home based role with good career potential in a industry I used to work in. In my current role as a Sales Executive I am earning good money and over achieve on my target on a regular basis. My current job is only a 5 minute commute from my house and the role is pretty stress free so I am very much in my comfort zone. The benefits are better in my current role than the job offer I received plus the on target commission is higher. However in my current role there is no real route for career progression.

    The new position I have been offered will be a more challenging role with a some travel involved. I am really torn with this decision. If I stay where I am I don’t know how long I will stay in the role as there is no career progression. However the job offer which is a more challenging and engaging role but with less pay and more career potential. I am 35 years old and very much at a crossroads!

    • Coach Wolfgang March 31, 2017 at 4:48 pm - Reply

      Thank you for writing! I can hear the struggle you are experiencing in your words. Focusing on your current needs, it sounds as though you are craving some challenge. In the near-term, are there opportunities (company-wide) for you to branch out in a way that more challenging work is available to you (via projects, etc.)? You are also seeking career progression, as well, which is not available for you at the current company. If you don’t take this current position offered to you, how certain is it that you will leave your current company in the next 6 months? This leads me to longer term questions: When you think about where you want your career to be in 3, 5, 7 years, what comes to mind? What are the skills that are necessary to get to that future role? What gaps exist from your current skill set to that future role? Knowing this information may help you decide what the best next position is for you. Good luck!

  22. Deb April 30, 2017 at 11:58 am - Reply

    Hi Coach. Your insights are really helpful. I have been tormented with a career decision for the past 2 months. I work with an international publisher, however the office that i work in is managed more like a traditional family business. The managing director takes all decisions, and there is little decision making at lower levels. Additionally, while publishing is a fast changing business today, the managing director still have a habit of looking at it from a traditional sales driven perspective and he tries to cut cost at every corner. Additionally he is rude and does not respect the ones reporting to him. On the other hand, he values me as an employee and is keen to ensure I am happy with the job. However i am worried about the quality of my coworkers (he will appoint people he likes and who are loyal in all important positions irrespective of their qualification), the lack of innovative ideas or investments, because of which I think the business will not succeed as much as it should.

    Earlier in this organization I had a toxic manager, and the managing director was blind to her horrible managerial skills till the lady was malicious to the managing director himself – post which he brought in a new good manager for me. I recently got a job offer from another organization with a bigger brand name with a higher pay. The moment i announced my intention to quit, he tried to make me happy by providing more flexible work hours, a better manager and probably a higher pay. Here is what i am concerned with. While he may be nice to me now, for past 3 years he didnot react at all when the toxic manager was torturing me. Hence I have lost faith in this organization. Additionally, going by the way he tries to cut corners, I am unsure how he will be able to scale the business up. He really wants me to stay and I find it tough to say no to him (which is making me feel horrible inside). He has given me a bigger role now and appointed a better boss. However I cant stand when he gives statements like, I am what I am today because of everything he has taught me. He keeps saying that I will be an important person in this organization. However, I want to move to an organization with better culture, however I have already established my credibility here and my coworkers respect me quite a bit. I also have some level of authority and freedom in this new place (however not enough freedom to improve the culture). I am torn between should I listen to the managing director and stay in this job, or just ignore everything he has said and take up the new job. Please can you advise.

  23. Deb April 30, 2017 at 12:12 pm - Reply

    To add to the above points, every time I am trying to let go of the new job offer, I have this almost physical pain. On the other hand, I cannot emphatically express to my current managing director my intention to go for fear of disappointing him after he has taken a few steps to retain me. I feel horrible inside. I have been to therapy, meditation, yoga etc but have not been able to get over this painful decision paralysis. I am also disgusted with the fact that i have not been able to make up my mind and emphatically said an yes or no to either of the two organizations.

    • Coach Wolfgang May 3, 2017 at 4:11 pm - Reply

      Thank you for writing, Deb! I can hear the struggle you are experiencing. Many sentences start with or contain the phrases “on the other hand” or “however” which demonstrates how torn up you feel. Oftentimes, when we are joining a company, it is the company culture or promise that we are joining. When we leave a company, it is often the people that make it the hardest to leave. When reading your post, there seem to be some foundational issues you are struggling with in the character of the Managing Director. On top of those character foundational issues are some building blocks that give you some hope about the future. The question I would have for you, are the foundational character issues something you are willing to continue to align with? The building blocks may change, but oftentimes it is hard to change the foundation. Take a deep look at the foundation and see if that foundation is steady enough for you to continue to build your career upon. I hope this helps.

    • Barney May 3, 2017 at 5:53 pm - Reply

      Deb, take it easy. If you are uncertain to that extent then maybe you shouldn’t go anywhere. However, remember this: You owe NOTHING to anyone except your family and yourself. These are your priorities. I am like you. I am loyal to a fault and get taken advantage of easily. But in the end, you need to think about what you want to learn, where your career should be five years from now, and #1 is your family. You owe nothing to anyone else. This is for you and your family, period. Just be sure to leave on good terms. Don’t be afraid of change…it’s good. And if things don’t work out as you planned, then so be it. At least you are in the arena, brave enough to make changes in your life for good intentions, rather than those cold, timid souls who criticize and go nowhere and do nothing. Good luck!

  24. Brooke May 19, 2017 at 1:44 am - Reply

    Good afternoon career coach,

    So I have a dilemma . I am 23 years old, I have been managing Taco Bell stores since I was 17-18 years old . I left about 4 months ago due to the fact that there was not a good life balance . However I have been very fortunate to be able to receive two job offers on the same day after 4 months of interviewing, but can not possibly decide between the two.

    Before I get into this I should say, I am a very driven person, quite ambitious, very level headed and laid back, bit of a jokester, but very focused on moving my career path forward, while finding that job that still has a work/life balance since I have two small children.

    I have received a job offer from Pizza Hut, a franchise that has been #1 out of all Pizza Hut franchises for 27 years . The other job is from a Arby’s franchise, who also has a very good name and has been growing at a very high rate , 200 stores a year to be exact.

    So here’s what I’ve put together by sitting down and really thinking about it :

    -The salaries are only 1000 dollars in difference
    – Both companies have a good name, but taking a job with this Pizza Hut franchise is a very grueling process . 3 hour interviews, 2 hour assessments, very few get through (making it sort of a prestigious position).
    -I plan to go to school over the next 4-5 years for business management with either company, both will allow me enough time to do so. But if I work for Pizza Hut for a few years an actual restaurant (applebees, Texas Roadhouse, etc.) MAY be willing to pick me up in management seeing how it’s more of a restaurant then Arby’s without a degree. But with a degree, which I plan to get no matter what, I could get one of those jobs with my current experience either way.
    -Pizza Huts turn over is extremely low(I feel this says high things about the company itself), but because of that, they have managers ready to take their own districts that have been there for 20+ years, meaning I wouldn’t be able to promote for probably that long (this is bad because I’m ambitious , and a little stir crazy). But at Arby’s because they are growing so fast , I would be likely to promote writhing 3-5 years(this is important to me).
    -both are family owned, so they both have excellent work/life balances (also very important)
    -I don’t like the guys who will be my boss as much at Pizza Hut , but the guys at Arby’s are awesome. Pizza Hut is very suit tie , very serious. And Arby’s is very laid back, still “get your stuff done attitude”, but have fun doing it. (This fits me better)

    The feeling I have is that I will have more fun at Arby’s , but I have to want to stay and make a career of it if I go there . Also, if I turn Pizza Hut down they will never look my directions again. However if i take Pizza Hut , Arby’s will probably make me an offer again later if I don’t like it, and it will be a very good, solid job, with a future (in 20 years, unless I leave). And Pizza Hut will give me more options if I ever do leave, and I’ll feel more proud about running a restaurant instead of quick service .

    SO , and advice on how to choose in these final moments ? I have till Monday to decide …

    Thanks for your help!

    Brooke Eads

  25. Brooke May 19, 2017 at 1:59 am - Reply

    I should also have included that both bonus, raise, and insurance benefits are the exact same .

    Only difference would be when/if I get the district manager spot with Arby’s in 3/5 years, which would be much sooner then I’d get one with Pizza Hut, I would receive a company car and gas car .

    Thanks again in advance for all your help!

    • Coach Wolfgang May 19, 2017 at 7:32 pm - Reply

      Brooke, thank you for writing! You have put a tremendous amount of time into thinking through these opportunities. You truly are being intentional with this process and owning your career. Take a moment to congratulate yourself on that. A couple of things come to mind for me when I am reading through your notes:

      – Which opportunity will best meet your short-term 1-3 year career goals?
      – Which opportunity will get you closer to your longer term career goals?
      – You mentioned this a bit, but how do you want your career to feel in the next 1-3 years? Which opportunity gets you closer to that feeling?
      – What will you be giving up by choosing one over the other? Be as specific as possible here. I would assume there would be a list with several items. Are you okay (feeling peace and settled) with what you could be giving up?
      – To get in touch with your heart: When you close your eyes and really visualize working at Pizza Hut – how does it feel? Do the same with Arbys. I want to get you out of your head for a moment and get in touch with your heart.

      I am truly happy for you that you have made these opportunities possible for yourself!

  26. Torrey Trexler June 9, 2017 at 3:06 pm - Reply

    I have accepted a job offer but having trouble putting in my notice with my current employer. The biggest reason I applied for the other job was because it is a career advancement. I known the person that was doing the role previously. Her praise of how much she learned from the manager was what caught my attention. The new role would be a different career path from my current position, but more in line with what I’m getting my Bachelor’s degree in. Both positions have pros and cons. The reason I am finding it hard to leave my current role is the room for advancement in my company. However, it will take me a few years to advance with my current company. My current role is Specifications Technologist (product data management) vs the new role is Supply Chain Analyst. I am in the process of getting my Bachelors degree in Supply Chain Management. I would say that the money has a factor in my decision, but I recently turned down a higher paid position with another company to remain in my current role. What am I missing that is making it so hard to leave my current role? Both jobs have flexibility for work / life balance.

    • Coach Wolfgang June 9, 2017 at 8:57 pm - Reply

      Thank you for writing! I appreciate your question. Sometimes we can obviously identify reasons we are ready to leave our company and sometimes they are subconscious. What do you appreciate about your current company? In what ways are they meeting your values/what is important to you?

      When we start at a job it is because we are interested in the position or company. When we leave, it is often hardest to leave the people. What role might ‘people’ have in your reluctance to turn in your notice?

      Your reluctance may also be wrapped up in fear. Oftentimes, fear of the unknown causes us to get stuck or remain in a situation. Not knowing what will happen may in the future can sometimes keep us rooted in a place where we aren’t fulfilled. That fear of the unknown can be very powerful. What role might fear be playing in your reluctance to turn in your notice?

      I would also suggest spending some time understanding the feelings and thoughts that come up when you envision turning in your notice. What feelings come up for you? What thoughts enter your head? These thoughts and feelings may be preventing you as well.

      I presented a variety of ways to think about your situation. I hope one or more of them helps you understand what is holding you back!

  27. Cecilia August 19, 2017 at 3:57 pm - Reply

    Hi Coach,

    I am currently working as an accountant for a big company for the past two years. I have been promoted 2 times since I’ve started with the company. My most recent promotion brought a lot more responsibilities and very little pay increase. With some recent changes in the company, I been feeling unappreciated and overworked. I am very emotionally attached to this company and my coworkers. If I stay with the company I can foresee some future promotions within the next year or so.

    Last week, I was contacted by a headhunter regarding a similar position at a smaller but growing company. The salary would be $10,000 higher and better working hours. I would learn some new skills and be exposed to another industry. The benefit package is not as good as my current company. I do see growth potential with this company, but it would be many years down the road. If I were to take this position, It would be an nice addition to my resume.

    I am very torn between staying at my current position and accepting this new job offer. Do you have any advice to help me in making this choice?

    • Coach Wolfgang August 21, 2017 at 4:56 pm - Reply

      Thank you for writing! You mention that you feel very emotionally attached to this company and co-workers. I would love to know more about this. I would encourage you to write down and get as specific as you can about this emotional attachment.

      Other than this attachment and the benefits package, what is keeping you in this role and at this company? Be as specific as you can. Oftentimes, when we are feeling underappreciated, we might miss some things that benefit us. You listed out some opportunities at this new company.

      Now that you are brainstorming, list out more than come to mind.

      When evaluating these opportunities, ask yourself, which one gets you closer to your 3-year career goals, 5-year goals, etc? Which opportunity is in alignment with your values, or those things that are most important to you?

      I hope some additional inner work on these opportunities and writing it down on paper will bring you more clarity!

  28. Hannah September 25, 2017 at 1:32 am - Reply

    Hello Coach,

    I have read through this post and comments and have found the suggestions useful, thank you for this.

    My dilemma is that my current role is very comfortable, in the sense that I have flexible hours, tons of holiday and sick leave (and more if I need it!)I know my role inside and out and am good at it, my colleagues are relaxed and I have never once dreaded a Monday ! The trouble with being comfortable is that I have been in the role for 3 years, and while I have seen yearly pay increments my role has not developed and there is no real opportunity for me to take on a more senior role which I feel I owe to myself to develop as a person.

    I have applied the evaluation techniques mentioned and have come up with the following:
    Top 5 values rated 1-5 (5 being the best fit) :

    team culture: (current role 3) (new role? website and employees met gave good references)
    varying role and interesting daily duties: (current role 2) (new role – from PD, 4)
    benefits ( social events, travel ): (current role 1) (new role – from what I have been told 4)
    office environment: (current role 4) (new role 2)
    opportunities to progress: (current role 1) (new role 4)

    I am also not particularly interested in the type of organisation I am in currently however the new role would be with a tech company which I am interested in.

    The part I am struggling with is relating to my gut, I have a negative anxious feeling when I imagine myself taking the job and leaving my current position, alternatively when I picture myself turning down the job offer and staying where I am I have a huge sense of relief and feel a lot lighter. Is this my gut or my tendency to be scared of change and risk?

    Really appreciate any thoughts you may have and how I might figure out what my gut is saying

    thanks

    • Coach Wolfgang September 27, 2017 at 5:42 pm - Reply

      First, I never discount intuition. It brings insights that no ‘paper’ exercise can bring. I took a job once that my gut told me not to take. The job itself was amazing. The work environment was not. My gut was warning me about that part of it.

      I want to make sure it is your gut that is telling you to stay and not fear. Sometimes fear will masquerade as your gut. Fear of the unknown is one of the most common fears we experience. Where in your body do you feel the negative anxious feeling? What does it feel like? What are the messages that are coming to you when you feel that negative anxious feeling?

      I would also suggest doing an imagery exercise – imagine where you are in your career 5 years from now. Try to take yourself there and see what it looks like, feels like. You can then imagine the two paths (your current job and this opportunity) that are currently in front of you. Which path seems to take you to this place you want to be at in five years.

      I hope this provides some additional insight!

  29. Michele Bettis October 25, 2017 at 2:42 pm - Reply

    Hi Coach,

    I left my career 12 years ago to raise my kids. I am an Environmental Scientist. I am at a point where I am ready to go back to work. I have 2 job offers that I am contemplating. One is back in my career, Environmental, and the other is with my kids school district as a guidance secretary. I have done side by side comparisons of each. They both have different perks so I am torn on which job to accept. The environmental position is more money, work only 7.5 hrs a day, great benefits, good opportunity for advancement, good flexibility, work independently, opportunity to telecommute, and of course back in my field, that I really like. But the downfalls from the environmental position are longer commute, work for a very large agency (state government) so not very much interaction, public speaking (something I dislike) and of course very political. The perks for the school position are good hours(7-3:30) 5 min commute, have 11 weeks off a year (benefits are year around but not pay) good benefits, work day is 8 hours, and more time with my family and kids. Cons for the school position are lower pay, only paid when work, full time position but not not year around pay, less flexibility, a secretary position, and not in my field. I am over qualified for the school position; however I am considering it because of the time off when my kids are off ( they are young teens). I am so torn. I want to get back into my career but I also want to be as present with my kids as much as I can. My kids are super active and involved with school and sports and taking the environmental job would require me to ask family to help get them where they need to be. The school position would allow me to still be able to do everything with my kids and get them where they need to be. I do feel like the environmental job is a career while the school position is just a job. As of now, I’m leaning towards taking the school position for a few years and then, when my kids are driving age, maybe then go back into my field. But I’m super concerned that the longer I stay out of my career, the less employable I will be. I was already concerned that being out of environmental for 12 years that no employer would give me a chance, but I was wrong. So I’m afraid I’ll mess up am opportunity. Ugh….I’m so torn. I’ve done side by side comparisons but am still unsure what to do. Any advice???

    • Coach Wolfgang October 25, 2017 at 8:49 pm - Reply

      Thank you for writing! I can see why you are torn. You have two different sides of your life tugging at you at the moment, time with family and career progression. A couple of thoughts that may give you new insights: at the end of your life, when you look back over the totality of that life, what will you regret not having done? Also, to get you out of your head (this question might take you out of your comfort zone, but helps shed a new perspective on an issue), when you close your eyes and imagine working at the school – what color do you see? When you close your eyes and imagine working for the environmental firm, what color do you see? What do those colors mean to you? Finally, I would ask you to explore if this is an ‘either/or’ scenario: if you choose to work at the school, what ways can you get involved in environmental work and close the skill gap without it being a full-time position? I hope these very different questions bring about some new insights!

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